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7-Day Blog Challenge: #DAY 4

10/8/2016

2 Comments

 
So. I sat here (because I can’t stand) ha ha sorry, my sick humour tends to take the piss out of shitty situations! Anyway, getting back to what I was going to type! Ha. So, yes… sitting here, racking my brain that has been frizzled from having a million things going on inside it this week with lack of sleep from the last 2 to 3 weeks! Trying to think of some kind of tutorial I can share with you guys for DAY 4 of the 7-day blog challenge. I’m secretly stressing because I’ve fallen behind…kinda. & now, it’s not a secret! Oops! & now I’m rambling! Fuck!

After what seems like a thousand and 75 hours of thinking, a light bulb turned on in my cute little-big head and HELLOOO! That annoying little thing that whispers in your ears when there’s an idea (we all have one! …don’t we?!) says; - YOU + BED = DAY 4 TUTORIAL!!!

What the fuck, right?? WRONG. For the majority of you reading this… yes! YOU, ya little minxie bastard – NO! this is not a sex scene! Ha ha! Geez, one mention of BED and the world turns into a giant orgy. Well, not here, not this time, not today buddykins! :)

Back on track girrrrl! – most of you don’t have a process of getting into bed, correct me if I’m wrong though, please! But I do. And I actually do have to teach people how to do it, every time I have to train a new caregiver. Turns out, that, that irritating little whisper thing had the right light switch turned on after all.

For me, it’s not just a case of undressing, changing into pj’s and then hopping in bed. Oh no way, that’ll be too easy! Kylie’s life is far from easy and has been for the last 17yrs. Why start making shit easy now.
Alright, so step by step for my bedtime routine is as follows:

BEFORE I’m even involved in the routine, the caregiver that is on shift that night has to get my bedroom ready. This consists of;

  • Stripping the bed down to just the sheet and head pillow. (folding and putting blankets and other pillows away in allocated areas) this is important as space is a luxury and a must – have!
  • Must make sure there are NO creases in sheet, on bed.
  • Hoist and Sling are on hand and ready.
  • Night bag with all needed accessories to go with it are set up in their rightful place.
  • Night time wash bowl and towels + flannels are ready to go.

Now the fun parts begin he he! (sorry NO, still no sex scenes lol)

  • About 9.30pm – 10.30pm at the latest most nights, I prep myself by doing teeth, then closing my internet browser. I leave my laptop on because I usually sit up in my bed (it elevates. Fancy pants hehe) & work on my blogs.
  • Drive into my bedroom and park in position.
  • Have a quick cat-wash; face, hands. Can’t forget to apply face oil. I forgot tonight, so, that’s annoying lol.
  • I’m then hoisted out of my chair using a sling and a portable hoist. Good shit! ‘aint nobody got time to try lifting me ha ha!
Picture
Picture
…I’m left hanging in the sling over my bed! Don’t worry guys, this badboy can hold up to 150kg’s – so, I am safe!! This gives my caregiver a chance to take my chair and plug it up to charge for the night, which then also gives us more space to work with.

By now, you guys would be in bed ha ha forming zzZzZzzZzzzZzz patterns! Lucky bastards!! Not to fear, I’m half-way…ish there! Ew! That was so not an intentional rhyme.

ALRIGHT – so! Next steps:

  • I then, lower myself down onto my bed, using the remote control to do so. While I’m doing that, the caregiver is on the opposite side of my bed, pulling me across so that I am going to land in the middle.
  • Sling is removed, I am then re-positioned so my body is straight rather than a twisted mess.
  • Bottom half of my clothing are removed. When it comes to dressing and undressing me, think of it like; you would cloth/unclothe a baby…pretty much, just a tiny bit more complicated.
  • EVERYTHING comes off. Even undies (yes, yes! You are reading correctly).
  • Again, another quick cat-splash and skin check.
  • Turned to one side to check my backside, making sure my skin is all okay.
  • Back onto my back, re-positioned again.
  • Passive exercises are done on arms, legs, feet, hands (IMPORTANT!!)
  • Pillows placed under my legs in certain positions and at end of feet to push towards me.
  • Bottle of water with a long straw is attached to my headboard, ready to be devoured throughout the night.
  • Bell alarm placed on my chest, in case I need assistance with anything through the night.
  • Fan is turned on and set on level 1, perfect breeze.

Goodnights and I love you’s are exchanged, lights are turned out and BOOOM!!! That is my step by step bed-time routine tutorial.

AND that folks, after an hour is a wrap!!
#TriggerYourBlog
 
Keep smiling, Stay happy XOXOX
2 Comments
Caroline link
10/8/2016 01:47:17 am

I love how you have shared this to give an insight into something many people (myself included) take for granted - Plus you made it fun too :-)

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Your Queen
10/13/2016 10:39:33 am

Whakatane I've known you HOW long!? I've even been in the room while this process has happened yet I never realised how much work goes into it! You high maintenance biarch! Bahaha. Sooooo loved reading this though my klone!

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